The Marathon Looms

Running a half marathon in November of 2012 was one of the most nerve-wracking yet exciting times in my life! God had broken me many months before, and the training had been complete. I laid my clothes out the night before and rehearsed the run in my head. My fears of not finishing or embarrassing myself replayed over and over in my mind. But, God’s faithfulness was even more overwhelming. And it was good.

Fast forward two months later, and Kaitlyn and I ran the Disney Princess 1/2 marathon at Disney. It was a magical time and something I will never forget! Disney knows how to run a race WELL, and we were not disappointed.

Even though we’ve run a few races here and there, our running over the past year has been spotty at best. Just like the Israelites of the Old Testament, I need to be reminded EVERY SINGLE DAY that my body is the temple of the Lord, and it is my responsibility to honor Him with what He has given me.

Thus, He led us to sign up for a marathon in January of 2015. And I can tell you this without hesitation…I am frightened…I am scared…I am anxious. And I don’t think I’m alone, but I could be dead wrong. When I cannot see what is coming, I worry. I allow the enemy to take root at times, and he can sink in deep very quickly. But, the One who is greater always shows Himself to me in His Word. He reminds me that He is faithful. He will sustain. He will bring glory to Himself. All that is required of me is obedience.

Obedience doesn’t show mean running the marathon. Obedience is the daily run…the get up and go run whether you feel like it or not run…the I’m not interested in your excuses run…the mundane…the monotonous..the boring.

For it is in the every day routine that endurance is slowly built. Each step builds a foundation that grows stronger with every run. Every completed run is a stepping stone to a great one that is to come.

So, I run. And sometimes I do it with a great attitude. Other times, my outlook stinks! But, I must continue…and run..and run some more. For the prize is out of sight right now, but each day brings it closer…and closer…and closer.

When Life Stinks!

When was the last time you had a week that just stunk? It was hard. It was exhausting. You were done. Finished. No more.

Obviously from the question you can tell that I had one of those weeks. It was a doozy. And I have a tendency to get down and out when things are overwhelming. I was biding my time each day until the littles went to bed.

Without JT, things get rough. And the younger kids thought they would pick this past week to act out accordingly. How thoughtful of them.

There were a myriad of things that went wrong…dead wrong…all week long. And I thought about praying those psalms where David is crying out to the Lord to kill his enemies. Only my enemies were loads of laundry, a worrying mind (my own), the absence of my husband, a constantly sick kiddo and several little people who shall remain nameless. I decided not to go the “kill my enemies” route.

Instead, God reminded me of His Sovereignty in His Word. As we are reading through Deuteronomy, we hear Moses remind the people OVER and OVER and OVER again about God’s rules and commands for them. It is a repeat of Leviticus basically. They’ve had forty years to review the laws…you would think they would’ve gotten it. But, they did not. They turn away from Him so easily and quickly.

And so do I. I grumble and complain. I am selfish. I am full of pride. I worry. I get easily frustrated. I sin. I sin again. I sin again and again. I forget God’s faithfulness. I neglect His Word.

But, He remains faithful and draws me close. I read His Word, seek Him in prayer and hear from fellow believers who push me to go deeper with Him. His Word is so good to show us His character:


“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” -Philippians 4:6

“The Lord is good to all, and his mercy is over all that he has made.” -Psalm 145:9

“For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations.” - Psalm 100:5

"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5


As I peer until the next 7 days, I don't want to live just waiting for the day to be over. I desire to have a heart and attitude that magnify Him despite the circumstances of life. No matter what happens this week, I KNOW this. He is God, and He is good. He is faithful when life seems good and He is faithful when life seems hard. He loves us and He wants us to be in a daily relationship with Him. Whatever He chooses to do is for His ultimate glory and our good. I will trust Him.

Read it and weep.

Every Father’s Day is the same…or it has been for the past 14 years. JT is gone on Father’s Day. The summer is the prime time for most people to go on a mission trip, and so, he leads others as they serve our Savior. And we are grateful beyond adequate words.

Since he’s away the kids have a little extra time to make their Father’s Day cards. As I prepared dinner, I sent the three youngest upstairs with only this instruction, “Jett, write Happy Father’s Day on the board so Zeke and Elly will know how to spell it.” And he did.

Then, they proceeded to laugh and make a lot of noise (not sure exactly how working on a card can cause that much commotion). The ceiling of the kitchen shook and I could hear them giggle. My high hopes for those cards pretty much went out the window.

And, then he brought me his card. Jett had the biggest smile on his face and placed it right in front of me. He’s not much of a writer and usually just puts the basics…the specific holiday, who the card is for and his own name. He’s more of a bottom line kind of kid.

I read it and wept. And I think you will too. There are no more words needed, but this kid pretty much summed up JT for all of us. Happy Father’s Day indeed. (we're still working on that spelling thing, just so you know).

This Kid

When God matched our hearts to his, we were all scared beyond words. He had never used an indoor bathroom. He had never eaten at a table or used a fork. He had never ridden in a car or felt air conditioning.

Without telling too much of his story, I'll suffice it to say that we all had a steep learning curve to be a family. His energy was unmatched by anyone in our house. And, as you can tell, he lives life to the fullest. Our family has never been the same, and I am grateful.

(Credit for the last two photos to Allison Lewis Photography)

No one has challenged us more or sent us to the foot of the Father faster. But, God has a plan, and I see it playing out before my eyes. We struggle daily but the determination he has to succeed is far beyond his years.

Lord, would you show Yourself faithful in and through Zeke's life? Please mold him into the young man You desire for Him to be. Give us strength, patience and discernment to follow after You whole-heartedly so that He will do the same. Help us to raise him in a way that brings You great glory. Thank you for the opportunity to parent this beautiful child. May he serve You with total abandonment all of his days.

A Glimpse of Glory....

I dread it for days…just knowing that JT is leaving town makes my heart sink. Oh, I KNOW that it’s what God has called us to do…that’s clear. And I LOVE that. It’s our lives…investing in people around the globe for His great glory. I am content and joyful and at peace with what God is doing with One Way Ministries.

The difficulty comes in leaving the youngest kids who still struggle with abandonment issues. They often act out when he leaves, and it is a great reminder of the grief that accompanies adoption. Wet beds, temper tantrums, fighting, grieving fits, yelling, crying, screaming, and on and on. I replay every possible negative and catastrophic possibility of what could happen while he’s gone. It sucks the very life out of me.

Friday morning, I awake to see the team from my house leave…I jealously watch them pull out of the driveway knowing that they are going to a place I love. I am anxious about the littles waking up just not knowing what will likely come my way.


But, here’s my chance to just say how GREAT our God is. Even when we are faithless, He is faithful…AMEN (2 Timothy 2:13)! Jett Turner woke up a young man I have only dreamed about. I’m seriously about to list his accomplishments for the day (and people, this is HUGE…HUGER than HUGE…GINORMOUS!)

-He initiated cleaning off the table without being asked. He led his siblings to do the same. AND FINISHED THE JOB WELL!
-He worked on his multiplication facts on the Ipad making a 97 out of 100!!!!
-He read ALL of his reading book and answered every comprehension question correctly!
-He opened all doors and allowed every female to go first without being reminded!
-He ASKED how he could help with lunch and dinner.
-He followed EVERY SINGLE instruction the FIRST time and with a cheerful heart!
-He cleaned out the pool without being told or given any instructions.
-He helped fold two loads of clothes without being asked.
-He cleaned out the toy basket in the living room in an orderly fashion.
-He said “Yes Ma’am” to every request and did not complain even once.
-He prayed for his family that went out of the country and thanked God for the opportunity to stay home with his younger siblings.
-He initiated playing a game of tic-tac-toe and memory with his brother. He even congratulated Zeke on winning!
-He played Uno with all of us and was joyful for whoever won!

Can I tell you what strides these all are? Initiating servanthood, working diligently, finishing projects/work well, excelling in schoolwork, following instructions, being thankful…oh, I could go on and on. My heart overflows today with God’s goodness and faithfulness through our oldest son. I have seen a glimpse of what God is doing in and through His life.

And just for your entertainment, here's a sampling of the 30 selfies he put on my phone while bringing it to me in the kitchen from the van (an approximate 30 second walk)...

I have no idea what the rest of the week will hold, but I will cling to this day knowing that God showed me something AMAZING that I will not soon forget. I saw a young man today…one that is chasing after God’s own heart. And my heart is bursting with joy!

In Need of Much Grace

The sun was coming up as evidenced through the slight crack in the bedroom curtains. Time to get up, God seemed to say. So I did. And, contrary to most days when I find solace in the leather chair in the keeping room, I sat down on the couch in the living room. Why did I do that?

I envisioned a lengthy quiet time with the Lord before my run. I didn't get it. I heard talking from the boys' room...and because in my dreams, I am a detective, I could tell they had been up for a while and their bedroom door was closed. I also know how much they weigh but that probably doesn't have anything to do with my sleuthing skills.

I was automatically angry.

Needing some grace, Lord.

I settle down and continue my plan when I hear them again, even louder. Their older sister went to Six Flags yesterday and is going to be extremely tired this morning. Let the girl sleep until at least 8, would ya? Nope. I hear them AGAIN.

Anger seething now.

Lord, please give me grace.

I tiptoe up the steps to find them in the floor of their room talking in regular voices. One of them is naked and has sheets crumpled on the floor in front of him. The other is just talking...not helping at all. I am mad. Another wet bed? That adds two loads to the already five loads I have to do today and DID I MENTION IT'S SATURDAY AND WE WANTED TO RELAX TODAY?

Grumpy and mean mommy comes out demanding that they finish stripping the bed. Get back in bed and go back to sleep until 8. Do not talk and do not make any noise. EVER.

With my arms full of sheets, blankets, wet clothes and three extra outfits that just so happened to be on his bed, I stumble back down the stairs, and I find myself enraged. Why are they doing this today? Is this the way our day is going to be?

I wanted to have my quiet time. I wanted to run. I wanted a shower. I wanted a hot breakfast. I wanted to relax and do nothing.

I, I, I, I, I.

I find myself in need of more than God's grace...I need His discipline first. God reminds me that they are my job. Those children are my responsibility, and I just taught them a thing or two about grace and mercy...because I showed them NONE.

As soon as they awake, there's an apology I will be making. And that shower? I hope it dumps God's grace all over me because I need it today.

A New Day

Do you know how long it takes to get your African daughter's hair done in a salon? Long enough that I've already calculated my older girls' transcripts and assured their graduation in 2015 and 2017 respectfully AND responded to 28 emails AND commented on at least a dozen Facebook statuses AND watched Elly play a pipe game on the Ipad exactly twenty-three times AND texted with friends and homeschool moms about curriculum for next year AND put all of the new reading and spelling curriculum into my cart (waiting until I can actually see ii before purchasing) AND writing this blog AND she still doesn't have her braids yet. Just in case you wanted to know. I arrived at 9:15. I think JT will have to bring me lunch and a pillow to take a nap and a charger for the Ipad and some Advil.

Anyhoo, to catch you up on my exercise regimen because I know you are all dying to know. Or could care less. Either way. I am officially running 3-4 days a week and cross training the other 2 days. One of my run days has to be speed work or hills. Neither one is enjoyable but it is helpful. It benefits my running, and so I do it. My enjoyment of discipline does not determine if I complete it or not.

Lately, I have been wrestling with a totally different issue and it involves homeschooling. Don't check out on me public/private school mommas. This is for ALL of us.

Our oldest two daughters just picked up on academics easily and succeeded with very little effort. I spent plenty of time teaching them the basics and foundational concepts. They soared quickly. They would sit in their little desks and write neat, correct answers. They were "easy."

And then God changed our lives with the addition of the three younger kids. English has not been their first language. There are boys in the mix. And different personalities. And learning styles. And who wants to sit still? Raise your hand. PLEASE, for the love of our sovereign Lord, raise your hand.

God has dealt with me in many ways this past year and one of them has been convicting my heart about the individual nature of each kid. I know that sounds simple, but I was kinda hoping that I could just group them all together and teach them with one style...you can laugh now. Each child is different and in remarkable ways. They all learn differently and at different paces. It is tiring on this momma.

So, it's like I'm starting over with them. Learning new curriculum. Figuring out a new schedule. Making the pieces fit together in such a way that I maintain my sanity, no one cries, and everyone loves to learn. Is that possible? I sure hope so.

You see, there's something bigger at stake here than academics. We NEED to learn Christ (Ephesians 4:20). How we learn as kids affects how we learn in later years. When we LOVE to learn, we will LOVE it for a lifetime. I want my kids to LOVE to learn so that as they study God's Word, they are learning Christ with the same passion (and even moreso). They will see the need to LEARN and will wholeheartedly seek after God in His Word.

Oh, Lord God Almighty, I pray for Your great wisdom and discernment to educate and train my children in such a way that they see their need for You and that they will DESIRE to LEARN you. Grant me patience and mercy to teach in such a way that You alone are glorified and honored.

(on a side note, all of these pics are old but they are the only ones I could find of the kids doing some type of schoolwork...mainly because I am just trying to survive each day and don't take many pictures under such duress)